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I've Learned... |
gelfen
Joined: Nov 22, 2003
Posts: > 500
From: Melbourne, Australia
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just some more humour to brighten the day.
As I've Matured...
I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in...
I've learned that one good turn gets most of the blankets.
I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just jackasses.
I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.
I've learned that whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are more screwed up than you think.
I've learned that depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
I've learned that it is not what you wear; it is how you take it off.
I've learned to not sweat the petty things, and not pet the sweaty things.
I've learned that ex's are like fungus, and keep coming back.
I've learned age is a very high price to pay for maturity.
I've learned that I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy it.
I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.
I've learned that artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
I've learned that there is a fine line between genius and insanity.
I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away. And the real pains in the ass are permanent.
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701
Joined: Nov 26, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: Romania
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Hahahaha that was good:-)
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judge
Joined: May 21, 2003
Posts: > 500
From: Romania
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There's much truth in those words... Your own thoughts, gelfen?
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iyiinsan
Joined: Oct 20, 2002
Posts: 366
From:
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So, are you insane or genius? lol. Nice stuff...
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gelfen
Joined: Nov 22, 2003
Posts: > 500
From: Melbourne, Australia
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@ judge: not so much my own thoughts as my own sentiments
@ iyiinsan: both my friend, both - although generally more of the former and less of the latter 
_________________
Gee, does that beat me? I only got two pair - two aces, and another two.
[ This Message was edited by: gelfen on 2003-12-09 23:11 ] |
sn3ipen
Joined: Aug 18, 2003
Posts: > 500
From: North-Norway
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god one. that whas a realy nice and fun prom that actually is true.
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masseur
Joined: Jan 03, 2003
Posts: > 500
From: Sydney, London
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FIFTEEN THINGS THAT IT TOOK ME OVER 50 YEARS TO LEARN - by Dave Barry
1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings."
3. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."
4. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
5. You should not confuse your career with your life.
6. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
7. Never lick a steak knife.
8. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.
9. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling
reason why we observe daylight savings time.
10. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.
11. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.
12. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.
13. A person, who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice
person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)
14. Your friends love you anyway.
15. Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.
FINAL Thought for the day: Men are like a fine wine. They start out as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the crap out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.
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shithappens
Joined: Sep 17, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia
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specially the last one....
now here's a tot:
how do u define divorce???
its a process of removing a man's genitals thru his wallet!!!
True Bravery is arriving home late after a boys' nite out, wife waiting with the broom & u ask: "Are u still cleaning or are u flying somewhere" |
*Jojo*
Joined: Oct 15, 2003
Posts: > 500
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Another 'masterpiece' from Gelfen and Masseur . . . were those self-made or re-copied ones ??? Anyway, they were really great and sensible as well - keep more coming ! |
701
Joined: Nov 26, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: Romania
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Hahaha 100% true! \"Have faith in God but lock ur car at nite\":-D
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Posted: 2003-12-09 03:55
