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Corner Shop |
Cycovision Joined: Nov 30, 2003 Posts: > 500 From: England PM, WWW
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Me? Oh, I'm nobody really. I'm just holding the fort whilst the owner is in the storeroom trying to find me a copy of "Chip Pan and Frying Utensil Collectors Monthly". It's ever so good, you know. It builds up monthly into a complete and definitive guide to the equipment needed for cooking foodstuffs in hot oil. And you get a free block of Lard with every issue.
Anyway, do you want to buy this here barren, arid landscape or not?
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alexslane Joined: Jan 10, 2009 Posts: 439 From: south wales u.k PM, WWW
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Knock knock, anybody there. Its me , monica i mean alex argh jesus that sophie ruined my brain.
Is that you guys hello! Please anybody!
Bronze trusted Trader ! <br />HTC Wildfire S |
hihihans Joined: Mar 15, 2009 Posts: > 500 From: Netherlands PM |
Shhh, hush hush. I hear something. Someone's at the door. Get behind the counter, we'll give him a little surpriseparty.
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Cycovision Joined: Nov 30, 2003 Posts: > 500 From: England PM, WWW
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Oh, is it that chap who used to work here I wonder? We used to have a really good laugh, we did. Chatting about bowel problems for hours on end over a curry flavour pot noodle, decorating cockroaches and woodlice with nail polish whenever the shop wasn't too busy, ah... great days...
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alexslane Joined: Jan 10, 2009 Posts: 439 From: south wales u.k PM, WWW
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Hey you Guys ,
there you are jesus how are you all, its been a while .................
So Whats occuring , i think you have missed me really and sorry for blowing the shop up.
i see that you have managed to open it back up its looking good .
Where to Start i got so much to tell you.
Well Prison life was a wee tad strange to say the least , well i sorted Sophie the Ex mafia/ bodybuilder out that i was tell you about , as i said she wanted to play doctors and nurses , well its seemed like a good idea at first then she asked to lower my undergarments . . . . . no obviously i am not like that so i stuck him with a home made knife that i was taught to make on the first day there ( we were watching Ross Kemps Hardest Prisons ) . . . . .
Lets just say that sophie was going to have a opperation to become sophie permanatly and now she dont need it !
oh say hello to my pet mr jingles the pet circus rat from mamaris , i have told him all about the shop he says that he will be able to help out with the day to day running of the shop and he is looking to set up a rat crack network and become a Rodent Crime Lord ( Sqeak Sqeak ) thats right me jingles we stuck Sophie Good did'nt we !
i have Brought Some Cheap bacco and fags back for you as a peace offering you can sell them , the wife wont mind they were hers.
the Wife and Kids have moved away because they say that i am a nutter , i dont think that is true at all ,
dont worry though i have found a new girlfriend now , i met her is the bail office , shes went dont for importing opium in dead animals, and ghb.
nice girl mind.
So hows tricks with you then !
Bronze trusted Trader ! <br />HTC Wildfire S |
_!GameKing!_ Joined: Mar 24, 2008 Posts: 40 From: Bradford, UK PM |
hello all.... except for alex,.... sorry..... i quit being the store keeper of this corner shop cuz im afraid this guy might burn it down again. |
Cycovision Joined: Nov 30, 2003 Posts: > 500 From: England PM, WWW
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Oh right! Does that mean there's a part-time job going? Great!
I'll start right away! First of all I'll stick pubic hairs to all of the soap in order to save the customers having to do it after they've bought it. Then I'll mix all of the newspapers up so that they all get delivered to the wrong houses. Then I'll go and scatter a load of mouse droppings all over sandwich counter.
We'll have this place up to standard again in no time
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tranced Joined: Jan 19, 2006 Posts: > 500 From: Santo Domingo, wonDeRland PM |
you can do double jobs here. arent you tech support somewhere else?
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Cycovision Joined: Nov 30, 2003 Posts: > 500 From: England PM, WWW
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Ah... well... it's a long story...
Basically, we had a minor disagreement over a certain, ahem, "gentleman's" website that I accidentally hosted on their Intranet server. Apparently, this 'compromised network security' to a level where a seven-year-old hacker in Pune managed to gain access to the Managing Director's wife's twitter account and post obscene tweets, which caused "untold damage to Stephen Fry's ego and even more to the reputation of the company". That's what they said, anyway...
[ This Message was edited by: Cycovision on 2009-05-18 20:51 ] |
tranced Joined: Jan 19, 2006 Posts: > 500 From: Santo Domingo, wonDeRland PM |
So you're not interested?
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Cycovision Joined: Nov 30, 2003 Posts: > 500 From: England PM, WWW
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Oh YES! I am very interested! I can start now if you like!
Look, there's a customer over there, shall I steal his wallet?
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tranced Joined: Jan 19, 2006 Posts: > 500 From: Santo Domingo, wonDeRland PM |
hackers dont do that
you're hired.
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Cycovision Joined: Nov 30, 2003 Posts: > 500 From: England PM, WWW
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Excellent! I won't let you down!
Now then, where's the Jack Daniels?
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lukechris Joined: Dec 30, 2007 Posts: > 500 From: Preston, UK PM, WWW
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You work here, ask yourself!
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Cycovision Joined: Nov 30, 2003 Posts: > 500 From: England PM, WWW
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It was a rhetorical question!
And what can I do for you, young sir? I've got a shitty old graphics card that won't work with your computer if you're interested?
Documentary DVD's about remote South American rain forest tribes where the women all get their saggy boobs out are in the corner over there; marked "special interest".
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