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Author 365 days of SEX
orang3
T68i
Joined: Mar 28, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: Never_never_Land
PM, WWW
Posted: 2002-06-09 15:04
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>365 days of sex
>TO MY DEAR GIRLFRIEND (WIFE):
>During the past year I have tried to make love to you 365 times.
>I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of once every ten
>days.
>The following is a list of why I did not succeed more often:
>54 times the sheets were clean
>7 times it was too late
>49 times you were too tired
>20 times it was too hot
>15 times you pretended to be asleep
>22 times you had a headache
>17 times you were afraid of waking the baby
>16 times you said you were too sore
>12 times it was the wrong time of the month
>19 times you had to get up early
>9 times you said weren't in the mood
>7 times you were sunburned
>6 times you were watching the late show
>5 times you didn't want to mess up your new hair-do
>3 times you said the neighbors would hear us
>9 times you said your mother would hear us
>Of the 36 times I did succeed,the activity was not satisfactory
>because:
>6 times you just laid there
>8 times you reminded me there's a crack in the ceilin
>4 times you told me to hurry up and get it over with
>7 times I had to wake you and tell you I finished
>1 time I was afraid I had hurt you because I felt
>you move
>TO MY DEAR BOYFRIEND (HUSBAND):
>I think you have things a little confused. Here are the reasons you didn't
>get more than you
>did:
>5 times you came home drunk and tried to screw the cat
>36 times you did not come home at all
>21 times you didn't cum
>33 times you came too soon
>19 times you went soft before you got in
>38 times you worked too late
>10 times you got cramps in your toes
>29 times you had to get up early to play golf
>2 times you were in a fight and someone kicked you
>in THE BALLS
>4 times you got it stuck in your zipper
>3 times you had a cold and your nose was running
>2 times you had a splinter in your finger
>20 times you lost the notion after thinking about it all day
>6 times you came in your pajamas while reading a dirty book
>98 times you were too busy watching football, baseball,playing
>video games etc. on TV.
>Of the times we did get together:
>The reason I laid still was because you missed and were
>screwing the sheets.
>I wasn't talking about the crack in the ceiling, what I said
>was,"Would you prefer me on my back or kneeling?"
>The time you felt me move was because you farted and I was trying
>to breathe.
>Once you read this letter you have to keep it going.
>This game has been played since 1996.
>You must send this letter to 7 people.
>On the 5th day someone will ask you out or say "I
>love, you."
>This is not a joke. It has worked for many years.
>If you break the chain,you will have bad luck with SEX
Deltayoda
T68i
Joined: Mar 03, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: Los Angeles, California
PM
Posted: 2002-06-09 20:54
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orang3 has decided to make the Esato forum the jokes forum?
orang3
T68i
Joined: Mar 28, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: Never_never_Land
PM, WWW
Posted: 2002-06-11 10:53
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hmm .. tht's a good idea ... but i need supporters ...

to provide endless jokes...
lor
P910
Joined: Mar 07, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: Planet Bob
PM
Posted: 2002-06-12 04:07
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i've read that before. [addsig]
ewap8
T68 grey
Joined: Nov 30, 2001
Posts: 398
From: Dubai
PM
Posted: 2002-06-12 06:25
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kolokoy
P990
Joined: May 16, 2002
Posts: 77
From: Philippine Islands
PM
Posted: 2002-06-13 19:10
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hmmmm...a case of bad sex...
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