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Girl help.I guess |
ÈL ® ö B ì Ñ
Joined: Feb 03, 2005
Posts: 281
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I'll sum it up quickly no one wants to hear the boring details lol, i have to be careful where I post as her and her mum look at my forum so thats a no no 
Basically we became close on msn, went out a few times etc....but she became really really depressed, there are so good reasons why and i'm not going to post them around the net, but I had her on MSN saying things like she can't take it any more, she wish she'd just die etc.
Now...I care way to much to just leave, and i'm not a jerk, so i talked through some things etc and the next day she seemed a bit better.
Was talking to her wed night, all's good, then thursday she gets my valentines card (which i posted through her door at 4.30am lol)....then she gets my roses I had delivered...all's good, she went to work and for the 1st time ever she asked if i could pick her up...usually she says no when i offer.
She got home and things wern't too good, there were some problems there.
Anyway she went a bit quite on msn, only replying once ever 30-40mins...i say goodnight, she says night and that's it.
I get up friday and i'm blocked on MSN, she won't reply to a single text or anything.
As far as i'm concerned, i got her a nice card, nice flowers, picked her up from work, talked to her on msn..........then i'm blocked and she won't talk to me.
I'm just really baffeled by it, i'm sure I've not done anything wrong, thoughts?
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BobaFett
Joined: Jan 06, 2004
Posts: > 500
From: Kamino (wish it would be Lund)
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ask her whats up. if she dont even answer within certain time, if she is not ready to respect u at least with an answer, to sit down and talk about it, then forget her imo. respect and understanding is more important then love...
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garlic_bread
Joined: Jul 20, 2006
Posts: 330
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that sucks. my girlfreind (well ex now) just stoped talking to me after 4 years with no reason that was a month ago and i still have no reason.
i do hope she contacts you i know how i feels 
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BobaFett
Joined: Jan 06, 2004
Posts: > 500
From: Kamino (wish it would be Lund)
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there is alwasy a reason... good or bad, but just out of fun nobody stops to talk with sy...
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Muhammad-Oli
Joined: Jun 13, 2004
Posts: > 500
From: The NZ of L
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That does suck.
Don't feel disrespected by her or anything, as she is obviously going through hard times and has a lot to think about. The fact that she blocked you shouldn't be taken too seriously at the moment either. Give her space, maybe a few days to a week before you talk to her about it, and be careful not to bring up sensitive subjects.
I believe she just needs time to think, and this may be about you, it may be about her home-life, about anything really. You've put in an effort and I don't think you have done anything wrong there mate. 
I have gone through similar with my girlfriend (her parents both hate me and have hated me since we started going out nearly three years ago) and we have got along well just through respecting each others space and being supportive. Its the way to go. Hang in there!
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[ This Message was edited by: Muhummad-Oli on 2008-02-16 13:44 ] |
MWEB
Joined: Feb 13, 2005
Posts: > 500
From: somewhere nicer than you
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Women are unfathomable creatures, so don't go looking for any sense or logic in any decisions or actions that they take.
My (vast) experiance has taught me that if YOUR the one who makes all the effort in any relationship then ultimatly it's doomed and your better moving on and looking elseware.
Oli offers some very sound advice, see how things settle and pan out before pushing it any further.
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ÈL ® ö B ì Ñ
Joined: Feb 03, 2005
Posts: 281
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Thanks alot guys appreciate it, she used to say I was too nice lol but I can't help that
She told me once how she'd never received flowers, so i throw on me suit and show up at her house with a nice big bunch for no reason at all, soppy eh lol.
I will give it time like you say, i just hope that in 4-5 days time i'm still blocked and she still hasn't said why, it's not the being blocked that's annoying, it's the not knowing why.
At the end of the day I want her to be happy, and if she's happy not talking to me then that's how it has to be I guess.
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ÈL ® ö B ì Ñ
Joined: Feb 03, 2005
Posts: 281
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On 2008-02-16 14:41:25, mweb6161 wrote:
Women are unfathomable creatures, so don't go looking for any sense or logic in any decisions or actions that they take.
My (vast) experiance has taught me that if YOUR the one who makes all the effort in any relationship then ultimatly it's doomed and your better moving on and looking elseware.
Oli offers some very sound advice, see how things settle and pan out before pushing it any further.
That's what another mate of mine said, he pointed out everything I had done and then asked what she had done for me and it made me thing....I have do so much stuff for her in the past week, little things like...we went out for ice cream 1 night and the place was closed, so the next day when she was upset, i went down town, bought her ice cream, left it out front and sent her a message saying look down.
Little things like that.
And the more I think about it the more I see she doesn't really seem to care what I do or try to do anything back. But the thing is, I know she's very unhappy and for some reason i want to help, don't know why i just like her so much that I want to help her, even as just a friend.
*thinks*
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ÈL ® ö B ì Ñ
Joined: Feb 03, 2005
Posts: 281
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You know what, i'm sposed to be going to a party tonight, me 1 mate and 5 girls....it's an *all night* party too at one of the girls house, we're staying there.
Now, do I go or not?
We're not going out and she won't even talk to me, do i throw this opportunity away for something that may not even happen or do I just go, but behave myself.
I won't do anything, but I feel guilty about going...hmm
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Ridahz
Joined: Oct 22, 2004
Posts: > 500
From: Manchester
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Theres something about women i dont get... There very strange, they wonder why us guys lose the plot, when its them who leads us lose our marbles, since my ex im very careful with girls lol, i can read them like books now lol!! 3 Girls are into me and i cant be bothered with any of them, but whatever they give me is just a bonus 
And yes, they MUST talk to me to get a reply lol, P.I.M.P anyone? 
Ridahz Feedback +29 -0 Titanium Trader  |
Muhammad-Oli
Joined: Jun 13, 2004
Posts: > 500
From: The NZ of L
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On 2008-02-16 14:53:23, ÈL ® ö B ì Ñ wrote:
You know what, i'm sposed to be going to a party tonight, me 1 mate and 5 girls....it's an *all night* party too at one of the girls house, we're staying there.
Now, do I go or not?
We're not going out and she won't even talk to me, do i throw this opportunity away for something that may not even happen or do I just go, but behave myself.
I won't do anything, but I feel guilty about going...hmm
Go man! Like you said, you're not going out with the girl.
What you should do at the moment is take your mind off things with her for at least a couple of days, and focus on keeping yourself happy. So go out, have fun. Its nothing to do with her what you get up to.
She has blocked you which likely means she doesn't want to talk at the moment, and so you just have to wait it out until she does want to talk! Try her in a few days mate.
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MWEB
Joined: Feb 13, 2005
Posts: > 500
From: somewhere nicer than you
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Someone once told me, " you have to throw a lot of darts at the board before you score a bullseye"
I envy those guys who end up with school friends as their lifelong partners, i was in my mid 20s before i met the right person after many false starts
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Ridahz
Joined: Oct 22, 2004
Posts: > 500
From: Manchester
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On 2008-02-16 15:05:35, mweb6161 wrote:
Someone once told me, " you have to throw a lot of darts at the board before you score a bullseye"
I envy those guys who end up with school friends as their lifelong partners, i was in my mid 20s before i met the right person after many false starts
I agree with that statment and i guess i will go through many girls before i find the right 1 now lol
Ridahz Feedback +29 -0 Titanium Trader |
ÈL ® ö B ì Ñ
Joined: Feb 03, 2005
Posts: 281
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Thanks guys, sounds silly but I actually feel better lol, I was sitting here all yesterday thinking about it all, now other people know and i realise it's not really something i've done I feel a bit better.
Just wondering are you all still fairly young? I turned 20 in November. (is that young or old lol). she's 19.
I'm sh*tting myself about tonight lmao, I think my mate basically realised that i've been down and that's why he's only invited me out with loads of girls, as you said, to take my mind of things.
I never know what to say though, thass why I plan to be nice and drunk before I go, drinking starts at 6 lol. Talking to 1 girl, with a mate is fine, but he's there with this girl he's seeing....and i'm gunna have to do stuff with about 5 other girls who i never met.
You know the shy type, who sits there, does sod all then goes home...well that's basically me lol, not sure what i'm going to do tonight, I don't plan to think about it. The plan is, leave my phone at home (no stupid drunken calls to people that way), go out and then just wake up in the morning and hope my trousers are still on lmao.
But I agree, girls always say it's men who loose the plot etc, they don't have a clue what they're doing to us lol.
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amnesia
Joined: Jan 15, 2004
Posts: > 500
From: Doha, London, Tokyo, Shanghai
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@garlic, happened to me too!!
I was with her for 3 years and she just vanished and stopped talking to me. I was such a gentleman too and gave her everything.
(then again, all my friend's who've had Japanese girlfriends have had that happen )
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Posted: 2008-02-16 13:55
