| Author |
Post Your funny Jokes Here |
Unibond
Joined: Jun 23, 2002
Posts: 70
From: Sunny Malta
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One morning, a man walked up to his wife and pinched her on her butt
and said, "You know, if you firmed this up we could get rid of your
girdle." The next morning the man woke his wife with a pinch on the
breast and said,"You know if you firmed these up we could get rid of your bra." With that, the woman turned and grabbed her husband by his privates. She said, "You know, if you firmed this up we could get rid
of the postman, the gardener, the pool man, and your brother."
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mhorton
Joined: Jan 13, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: UK
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mhorton
Joined: Jan 13, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: UK
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Lightweight??
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mhorton
Joined: Jan 13, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: UK
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Find the apricot...
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Unibond
Joined: Jun 23, 2002
Posts: 70
From: Sunny Malta
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great photos mhorton, problem is I can't see them directly here. What I do is right click on the red X (photo) then check properties for the url. What is wrong, do I need some special software.
Thanks
T.M. |
mhorton
Joined: Jan 13, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: UK
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No I can see them fine. Is anyone else having the same problem
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brownjs
Joined: May 03, 2002
Posts: 222
From: scotland
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ha ha great jokes keep em coming |
mhorton
Joined: Jan 13, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: UK
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Don't worry I will
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brownjs
Joined: May 03, 2002
Posts: 222
From: scotland
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GREAT THEN |
mhorton
Joined: Jan 13, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: UK
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Unibond
Joined: Jun 23, 2002
Posts: 70
From: Sunny Malta
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Disgustingly Funny
There was a little girl and her mother walking through the park one day
and they saw two teenagers having sex on a bench. The little girl says "Mommy what are they doing?" The mother hesitates then quickly replies "Ummm..... they are making cakes."
The next day they are at a zoo and the little girl sees two monkeys
having sex. Again she asks her mother "What are they are doing?"
And her mother replies with the same response, "They are making cakes."
The next day the girl says to her mother "Mommy, you and Daddy were
making cakes in the living room last night, eh?"
Shocked the Mother says, "How do you know?"
She says, "Because I licked the icing off the sofa
PS: mhorton don't worry, sometimes they work other times they don't. Probably my computer is going mad. Thanks anyway
T.M. |
mhorton
Joined: Jan 13, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: UK
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Unibond
Okay mate
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orang3
Joined: Mar 28, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: Never_never_Land
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A patient in Woodbridge is singing on his bed.At 1st, he sing with his back lying on the bed......... ~~~~and sing and sing and sing.........
then later, he change his position with his face down
...........
The nurse ask him why he prone on the bed and sing?
He said:" Side A finished liao, now playing Side B "
Sex is like hacking. You get in, you get out, and you hope you didn't leave something behind that can be traced back to you |
orang3
Joined: Mar 28, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: Never_never_Land
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Oxford Dictionary's latest definition of the following words.
> >>Divorce: Future tense of marriage.
> >>
> >>Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with
> >>fire at one end & a fool on the other.
> >>
> >>Lecture: An art of transferring information from the
>
> >>notes of the lecturer to the notes of the
> >>students without passing through "the minds of
> >>either"
> >>
> >>Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by
> the
> >>number present.
> >>
> >>Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way
>
> >>that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
> >>
> >>Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine
> >>will-power is defeated by feminine water power...
> >>
> >>Dictionary: A place where success comes before work.
>
> >>
> >>Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, no
> >>body listens and everybody disagrees later on.
> >>
> >>Classic: A book which people praise, but do not
> read.
> >>
> >>Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things
> straight.
> >>
> >>Office: A place where you can relax after your
> >>strenuous home life.
> >>
> >>Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to
> open
> >>their mouth.
> >>
> >>Etc: A sign to make others believe that you know
> more
> >>than you actually do.
> >>
> >>Committee: Individuals who can do nothing
> >>individually and sit to decide that nothing can be
> >>done together.
> >>
> >>Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.
> >>
> >>Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.
> >>
> >>Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during
> life,
> >>to be spoken of when dead.
> >>
> >>Opportunist: A person who starts taking bath if he
> >>accidentally falls into a river.
> >>
> >>Optimist: A person who while falling from Eiffel
> tower
> >>says in midway "See I am not injured yet."
> >>
> >>Miser: A person who lives poor so that he can die
> rich.
> >>
> >>Father: A banker provided by nature.
> >>
> >>Criminal: A guy no different from the rest....except
>
> >>that he got caught.
> >>
> >>Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and
> late
> >>when you are early.
> >>
> >>Politician: One who shakes your hand before
> elections
> >>and your confidence after.
> >>
> >>Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and
> >>kills you with his bills.
Sex is like hacking. You get in, you get out, and you hope you didn't leave something behind that can be traced back to you |
orang3
Joined: Mar 28, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: Never_never_Land
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http://fotm.rotten.com/fotm/three-monkeys.jpg
Sex is like hacking. You get in, you get out, and you hope you didn't leave something behind that can be traced back to you |
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Posted: 2002-06-26 17:24
