| Author |
Mince and Meths solve all your problems |
methylated_spirit
Joined: Jul 07, 2004
Posts: > 500
From: Bonnie Scotland
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Superb!!!  
Hello, Scroto!
U.G.L.Y. You ain't got no alibi, you ugly! | |
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govigov
Joined: Jul 30, 2004
Posts: > 500
From: Back home - Cochin
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Quote:
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On 2004-10-24 23:02:33, methylated_spirit wrote:
I dont fancy him or anything, and hes dead anyway. Shagged someone (female) that looks a bit like him...
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how can you shag a female?? i am very much interested... |
mince-inside
Joined: May 09, 2004
Posts: 452
From: Made in Alnwick living in Scot
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Lower you standards - something will crop up
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methylated_spirit
Joined: Jul 07, 2004
Posts: > 500
From: Bonnie Scotland
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Well, what happens is, when you get sexually aroused, you get a thing called an erection. You stick this into a lady's genitalia (with permission) then spend a minute or 2 groaning and grabbing her boobies. Then you fall asleep.
Hello, Scroto!
U.G.L.Y. You ain't got no alibi, you ugly! |
methylated_spirit
Joined: Jul 07, 2004
Posts: > 500
From: Bonnie Scotland
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I've just had a pm for help from a member, i won't mention his (or her) name, to preserve their dignity, i will call them (in light of recent conversations) Frankie.
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The pm:
What ho, old boy, im in a bit of a tizzy, couldnt take a gander at the situation, could you? Well, the trouble seems to be this. Whenever i start taking an interest in a subject, posts from the other members seem to drop orf in a rather worrying manner. Its chipper for the first while, but when i start to enthuse on the subject, well, everyone starts typing some rather unusual gibberish, as i recall it goes something like this:
waffle waffle waffle waffle pontificate pontificate pontificate BORED!!!
Now, what with you knowing the lay of the land in the tricky political minefield that is the garbage thread, i was wondering if you couldnt be so generous as to perhaps shed some light on what these runes mean? Anyhoo, im off for tea and crumpets with Ginger and Fizz. Ciao for Now, Frankie.
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Well Frankie, thats a good question. Waffle is not, as our fine friends from across the pond call it, a tasty breakfast similar to pancakes, perhaps the nearest translation we have is "pish". And when they type the word "pontificate", it is a gentle, friendly jibe, in which they are inferring that you should "shut your hole" for a little while. Perhaps you are being over-enthusiastic in your approach, to be fair, you dont half hit a subject with gusto. Perhaps they welcome this, however, your exhuberance is starting to grate a little, after all too much of a good thing can become tiring. For exmaple, bouncy castles. Brilliant fun! But could you be bothered with the same bouncy castle, day after day after day? Of course not. Sometimes you need to get off and have a rest. Have a nice day, old boy. And give Mrs Miggins a cheery wave for me next time you pop into her pie shop!
Any more problems?
Hello, Scroto!
U.G.L.Y. You ain't got no alibi, you ugly! |
kimcheeboi
Joined: Dec 19, 2003
Posts: > 500
From: Abducted by hot blondes to Les
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@blackspot-ROFLMAO!!!!
govigov-try not being yourself 
[addsig] |
Burgaz
Joined: Mar 25, 2004
Posts: > 500
From: Cwmbranistan, S. Wales
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She's a hotty!
[ This Message was edited by: Burgaz on 2004-10-26 04:51 ] |
kimcheeboi
Joined: Dec 19, 2003
Posts: > 500
From: Abducted by hot blondes to Les
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@the dynamic-dodos
what do you think about perverts with their cell phone cameras?
[addsig] |
methylated_spirit
Joined: Jul 07, 2004
Posts: > 500
From: Bonnie Scotland
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Well, kim, they are clearly grubby little losers. I dont blame the manufacturers, it is good technology that has applications innumerable, but as usual, their hard work has been abused by the masses.
Hello, Scroto!
U.G.L.Y. You ain't got no alibi, you ugly! |
kimcheeboi
Joined: Dec 19, 2003
Posts: > 500
From: Abducted by hot blondes to Les
PM |
and how was frankie howard? 
[addsig] |
methylated_spirit
Joined: Jul 07, 2004
Posts: > 500
From: Bonnie Scotland
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Gentle.
Hello, Scroto!
U.G.L.Y. You ain't got no alibi, you ugly! |
scotsboyuk
Joined: Jun 02, 2003
Posts: > 500
From: UK
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Quote:
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On 2004-10-26 02:03:16, methylated_spirit wrote:
I've just had a pm for help from a member, i won't mention his (or her) name, to preserve their dignity, i will call them (in light of recent conversations) Frankie.
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The pm:
What ho, old boy, im in a bit of a tizzy, couldnt take a gander at the situation, could you? Well, the trouble seems to be this. Whenever i start taking an interest in a subject, posts from the other members seem to drop orf in a rather worrying manner. Its chipper for the first while, but when i start to enthuse on the subject, well, everyone starts typing some rather unusual gibberish, as i recall it goes something like this:
waffle waffle waffle waffle pontificate pontificate pontificate BORED!!!
Now, what with you knowing the lay of the land in the tricky political minefield that is the garbage thread, i was wondering if you couldnt be so generous as to perhaps shed some light on what these runes mean? Anyhoo, im off for tea and crumpets with Ginger and Fizz. Ciao for Now, Frankie.
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@Regular Advice Seekers
As regular readers of this thread will know I am not a regular contributor to it, however, as this problem is so difficult I have been asked to step.
@Frankie
I see two possibilities here;
1.) You need to increase the number of posts you make and fill them all with bland, mono-syllabic answers that are straight to the point and completely devoid of any form of humour whatsoever, be that sarcasm, irony, satire or anything else. In time you will grow to like posting like a robot, perhaps you may even decide to connect your head to your knees with wiring in a cheap reminisce of the Borg; perhaps you may even marry the toaster. However, you look at it, it's a bright future. 
2.) You are in fact posting amazingly interesting posts stuffed to the brim with chuckles, gags, guffaws, chortles and even a few knee slaps. The fact that other members start posting gibberish is because they just can't stop vibrating with mirth at your witty insights. You obviously have a jib who's cut you can be proud of and I think I may be right in saying that you should post more often, perhaps even taking on some staff to help you spread those facial muscle relaxant posts of yours. Enjoy your crumpet and remember to shut that door on your way out.
Good luck Frankie, we know you can do it, we're all counting on you.
"I may be drunk my dear woman, but in the morning I will be sober, and you will still be ugly." WSC |
methylated_spirit
Joined: Jul 07, 2004
Posts: > 500
From: Bonnie Scotland
PM |
Its not always facial muscles that rel;ax when "Frankie" posts...
Hello, Scroto!
U.G.L.Y. You ain't got no alibi, you ugly! |
mince-inside
Joined: May 09, 2004
Posts: 452
From: Made in Alnwick living in Scot
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@scotsobyuk - don't call us, we'll call you
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scotsboyuk
Joined: Jun 02, 2003
Posts: > 500
From: UK
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@mince
I already received the call, hence my invaluable advice.
@meths
Has Frankie gone to Hollywood yet?
"I may be drunk my dear woman, but in the morning I will be sober, and you will still be ugly." WSC | |
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Posted: 2004-10-25 10:47
