| Author |
Post Your funny Jokes Here |
sailaab
Joined: May 19, 2005
Posts: > 500
From: India
PM |
@king ~ u r right.. that IS offensive :-x !! :-(
This message was posted from a P910i | |
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sailaab
Joined: May 19, 2005
Posts: > 500
From: India
PM |
wicked.. but had me in splits;)
A Penguin
A guy is walking down the street, and he’s really horny. So he goes to the first whore house he sees. He only has five dollars, so they kick him out. The guy goes to the next one. But, since he only has five dollars, he gets kicked out again.
So by this time, he’s really super horny, so he goes to the next one and says “Look, I only have five dollars. I’m really horny, and I need a blow-job for 5 dollars!”
The guy there says, “OK. For five dollars, we can give you a penguin.”
“What’s a penguin?”
“You’ll see!!!”
So, the guy takes the $5 and leads the horny man to a bedroom. The horny man unzips his pants, and waits for his “penguin.” Soon, a prostitute comes in and starts giving the guy a blow job. Just as he’s about to loose his load, she stops and walks away.
Now, the horny guy with his pants at his ankles, waddles after her, shouting, “HEY! WHAT’S A PENGUIN?!?”
Today is the First Day of the Rest of my Life! SE  TRIVIA |
Lo-couk
Joined: Dec 14, 2006
Posts: 270
From: West Yorkshire England.
PM, WWW
|
An Irishman, Aussie and a Scouser are in a bar and spot Jesus drinking on his own.
They each send him a drink over and he sips each one slowly.
When he's finished he walks over to the Irishman and shakes his hand and thanks him for the Guiness. "f**k me, my arthritis has gone!"
Jesus then thanks the Aussie for the Fosters. "nice hell mate, my bad back's cured!"
Jesus approaches the Scouser who runs away screaming, "f**k off, you cool - I'm on disability benefit".
iphone 4 16Gb |
goldenface
Joined: Dec 17, 2003
Posts: > 500
From: Liverpool City Centre
PM |
Here is the news:
An Austrian circus dwarf died recently when he bounced sideways from a trampoline and was swallowed by a hippopotamus. Seven thousand people watched as little Franz Dasch popped into the mouth of Hilda the Hippo and the animal's gag reflex forced it to swallow. The crowd applauded wildly before other circus people realised what had happened.
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Lo-couk
Joined: Dec 14, 2006
Posts: 270
From: West Yorkshire England.
PM, WWW
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Little BILLY was sitting on a park bench munching on one chocolate bar after another.
After the 6th one, a man on the bench across from him said,
"Son, you know eating all that chocolate isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat."
Little BILLY replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old."
"Oh?" replied the man. " Did your grandfather eat 6 chocolate bars at a time?"
"No" replied Little Billy, "he minded his own ******* business!!"
_________________
I've never laughed so much since grandad caught his foreskin under the sander...
[ This Message was edited by: Lo-couk on 2007-10-16 18:51 ] |
goldenface
Joined: Dec 17, 2003
Posts: > 500
From: Liverpool City Centre
PM |
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.'
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead."
___________________________________________________________
A successful businessman flew to Vegas for the weekend to gamble.
He lost the shirt off his back, and had nothing left, but five dollars and the second half of his round trip ticket. If he could just get to the airport, he could get himself home.
So, he went out to the front of the casino where there was a cab waiting. He got in and explained his situation to the cabbie. He promised to send the driver money from home, he offered him his credit card numbers, his drivers license number, his address, etc. but to no avail. The cabbie said, "If you don't have fifteen dollars, get the hell out of my cab!"
So the businessman was forced to hitch-hike to the airport and barely made it in time to catch his flight.
One year later the businessman, having worked long and hard to regain
his financial success, returned to Vegas, and this time he was a big winner. Later, feeling pretty good about himself, he went out to the front of the casino to get a cab back to the airport.
Who should he see at the end of a long line of cabs, but his old buddy who had refused to give him a ride when he was down on his luck.
The businessman thought for a moment about how he could make this guy pay for his lack of charity, and he hit on a plan.
The businessman got in the first cab in the line, "How much for a ride to the airport, " he asked? "Fifteen bucks," came the reply.
"And how much to give me a blow job on the way?"
"What? Get the hell out of my cab!"
The businessman got into the back of each cab in the long line and asked the same questions, with the same result.
When he got to his old friend at the back of the line, he got in and asked "How much for a ride to the airport?" The cabbie replied, "Fifteen bucks." The businessman said, "O.K." and off they went. Then, as they drove slowly past the long line of cabs, the businessman gave a big smile and a thumbs up to each driver.
Ahhhhh, sweet revenge.
[ This Message was edited by: goldenface on 2007-10-17 14:51 ] |
KingBooker5
Joined: May 12, 2007
Posts: > 500
From: London, England
PM |
After every flight, pilots fill out a form, called a gripe sheet which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some maintenance complaints submitted by pilots and the solutions recorded by maintenance engineers. By the way, the airline these came from is the only major airline that has never, ever, had an accident.
Pilot: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement. Engineers: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
Pilot: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough. Engineers: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.
Pilot: Something loose in cockpit. Engineers: Something tightened in cockpit.
Pilot: Dead bugs on windshield. Engineers: Live bugs on back-order.
Pilot: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent. Engineers: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
Pilot: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear. Engineers: Evidence removed.
Pilot: DME volume unbelievably loud. Engineers: DME volume set to more believable level.
Pilot: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick. Engineers: That's what friction locks are for.
Pilot: IFF inoperative in OFF mode. Engineers: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
Pilot: Suspected crack in windshield. Engineers: Suspect you're right.
Pilot: Number 3 engine missing. Engineers: Engine found on right wing after brief search.
Pilot: Aircraft handles funny. Engineers: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.
Pilot: Target radar hums. Engineers: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.
Pilot: Mouse in cockpit. Engineers: Cat installed.
Pilot: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer. Engineers: Took hammer away from midget
__________________________________
After numerous rounds of "We don't even know if Osama is still alive," Osama himself decided to send George W. Bush a letter in his own handwriting to let the President know he was still in the game.
Bush opened the letter and it appeared to contain a single line of coded message:
370HSSV-0773H
Bush was baffled, so he e-mailed it to Condi Rice. Condi and her aides had no clue either, so they sent it to the FBI.
No one could solve it at the FBI so it went to the CIA, then to the NSA.
With no clue as to its meaning they eventually asked Britain's MI-6 for help. Within a minute MI-6 called the White House with this reply, "Tell the President he's holding the message upside down."
__________________________
Attorneys
These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.
ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning? WITNESS: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?" ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you? WITNESS: My name is Susan! ____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. ____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active? WITNESS: No, I just lie there. ____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory? WITNESS: I forget. ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot? ___________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo? WITNESS: We both do. ATTORNEY: Voodoo? WITNESS: We do. ATTORNEY: You do? WITNESS: Yes, voodoo. ____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning? WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam? ____________________________________
ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he? WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty. ___________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken? WITNESS: Are you shitt'in me? _________________________________________
ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time? WITNESS: Uh.... I was gett'in laid! ____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: She had three children, right? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: How many were boys? WITNESS: None. ATTORNEY: Were there any girls? WITNESS: Are you shitt'in me? Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney? ____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated? WITNESS: By death. ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated? WITNESS: Now whose death do you suppose terminated it? ____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual? WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard. ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female? WITNESS: Guess. _____________________________________
ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney? WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work. ______________________________________
ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people? WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. Would you like to rephrase that? _________________________________________
ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to? WITNESS: Oral. _________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m. ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time? WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him! ____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample? WITNESS: Huh....are you qualified to ask that question? ______________________________________
And the best for last:
ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor? WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless? WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law
______________________________________
Rules from men to women:
Men are NOT mind readers.
Learn to work the toilet seat. You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
Sunday sports . It’s like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
Crying is blackmail.
Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem. See a doctor.
Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
If you won’t dress like the Victoria ’s Secret girls, don’t Expect us to act like soap opera guys.
If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us.
If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
If we ask what is wrong and you say “nothing,” We will act like nothing’s wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, Expect an answer you don’t want to hear.
When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine… Really .
Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
You have enough clothes.
You have too many shoes.
I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
Rules from men to men:
1. Any man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his fellow partygoers.
2. Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.
3. It is ok for a man to cry under the following circumstances:
a) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse b) After wrecking your boss' Ferrari c) When your date is using her teeth
4. Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.
5. If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever, unless you actually marry her.
6. The minimum amount of time you have to wait for a guy who's running late is 5 minutes. Maximum waiting time is 6 minutes
7. Bitching about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. Gripe at will if the temperature is unsuitable.
8. No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. (In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional.)
9. When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may always ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.
10. Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.
11. If a man's zipper is down, that's his problem --- you didn't see nothin'.
12. Women who claim the "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to pick a buffalo wing clean.
13. If you complement a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.
14. Phrases that may not be uttered to another man while lifting weights: a) Yeah, Baby, Push it! b) C'mon, give me one more! Harder! c) Another set and we can hit the showers! d) Nice Ass, are you a Sagittarius?
15. Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.
16. When a buddy is trying to hook up, you may sabotage him only in a manner that gives you no chance of hooking up either.
If you're a guy: You will laugh a little and realize how true this is!
If you're a woman: Laugh and roll your eyes at our stupidity!
__________________________________
Three couples got married and spent their honeymoons at the same hotel, where they were all attended to by Jeff the Bellboy. The first man married a nurse. Jeff showed them to their room, all the while thinking to himself, "Lucky guy! Nurses are known to be hot to trot." The second man married a telephone operator. Jeff showed them to their room, while thinking to himself, "Wow, he's one lucky dude. Telephone operators have such sexy voices and once you pop that top button... Va-voom." The third man married a school teacher. Jeff showed them to their room and thought to himself, "Poor sap. She may be pretty, but teachers are way too frigid."
At 5:30 the following morning, Jeff reported to work. He expected the teacher's husband to call for breakfast any minute, but was sure the other two wouldn't call until much later in the day.
The phone rang at 6 a.m. and it was the nurse's husband wanting breakfast. Jeff took breakfast up to the room and when the husband opened the door, Jeff stepped back in shock. The man's pyjamas were still pressed and his hair nicely combed. "Sir, what happened?" asked Jeff. "You married a nurse." "Son, don't ever marry a nurse," the man sourly replied. "All I heard last night was her nagging voice saying, 'You're not sanitary, you're not sanitary'."
The phone rang again at 6:30 a.m. and this time it was the telephone operator's husband calling for breakfast. Jeff took it to the room as quickly as possible. When the man opened the door, Jeff stepped back in shock. The man's hair was neatly combed and his pajamas nicely pressed. "What happened?" Jeff asked with surprise. "Telephone operators as supposed to be as sexy as their voices." "Son, don't ever marry a telephone operator," the man groaned. "All I heard last night was Her nasal voice saying, 'Your three minutes are up, your three minutes are up'." Jeff returned to his desk, sure that the teacher's husband would be calling at any moment.
Finally, at 4 p.m., the teacher's husband called for breakfast. Jeff couldn't believe it, but quickly took the breakfast to the couple's room. When the man opened the door, Jeff stepped back in shock. The man was wearing only a pair of boxers, his hair was a mess, and there were Scratches all over his chest, arms and legs. "My goodness sir, what happened to you?" Jeff asked, fearing the worst. "Did you have a fight?" The man, grinning from ear to ear, happily replied, "No. Son, when you marry be sure it's to a school teacher. All I heard last night was her sexy, smooth voice saying, 'We're going to do this over, and over, and over again, until we get it right'."
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humphreybc
Joined: Oct 10, 2007
Posts: 64
From: Christchurch, New Zealand
PM |
My love for you is like diarrhea.
...
I just can't keep it in. |
OffLineR
Joined: Jan 17, 2003
Posts: > 500
From: Istanbul, Turkey
PM |
@KingBooker5
Thanks for the jokes.
LMAO 
Forever !!! |
vladn02
Joined: Sep 17, 2007
Posts: 259
From: Ukraine
PM |
A sexy woman went up to the bar in a quiet rural pub.
She gestured alluringly to the bartender who approached her immediately.
She seductively signaled that he should bring his face closer to hers.
As he did, she gently caressed his full beard. "Are you the manager?" she asked, softly stroking his face with both hands.
"Actually, no," he replied.
Can you get him for me? I need to speak to him," she said, running
her hands beyond his beard and into his hair.
"I'm afraid I can't," breathed the bartender. Is there anything I can do?"
"Yes, I need for you to give him a message," she continued running her forefinger across the bartender's lipsand slyly popping a couple of her fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them gently.
"What should I tell him?" the bartender managed to say.
"Tell him," she whispered, "there's no toilet paper, hand soap, or paper towels in the ladies room."
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vladn02
Joined: Sep 17, 2007
Posts: 259
From: Ukraine
PM |
Smart-ass Answer #1:
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets.
As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened
his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat...she said,
Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub."
Smart-ass Answer #2:
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but
couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy,
"Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're
dead."
Smart-ass Answer #3:
The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled
down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said. The kid
replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could." When the cop finally
stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.
Smart-ass Answer #4:
A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads,
Low bridge ahead'. Before he knows it, the bridge
is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up
for miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car
and walks around to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says,
"Got
stuck, huh?" The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and
ran
out of gas."
and finally, the
SMART-ASS ANSWER OF THE YEAR:
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's
final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here
tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or
illness, or a death in your immediate family but that's it, no other excuses
whatsoever!" A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and
asked,
"What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and
utter sexual exhaustion?"
The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence is
restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head,and
sweetly says, "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other
hand."
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aldrinus
Joined: Jan 16, 2005
Posts: > 500
From: Philippines
PM |
@king...
that oct 18 post really made my day... its wickedly hilarious and somehow downright honest!
cheers, mate!
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nicv27
Joined: Oct 15, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: kent
PM |
Paddy is appearing on Who Wants To Be a Millionaire.
Chris: "Paddy you've done very well so far. You've got £64,000 and
one life line left - phone a friend. The next question will
give you £125,000 if you get it right but, if you get it
wrong, you'll will be out of the game and drop to £32,000.
Are you ready?"
Paddy: "For sure Chris, I am."
Chris: "On the screen is a photo of a current Manchester United
player as a baby. Which Manchester United player is it? Now
think about this carefully, Paddy, it's worth £125,000.
You're only three questions away from one million pounds."
Paddy: "I think I know who it is... er, but I'm not 100% sure... no
I'm sure it's Beckham, I'm sure it's Beckham... Can I phone a
friend, Chris, just to be sure?"
Chris: "Yes Paddy, who do you want to phone?"
Paddy: "I'll phone Murphy."
(ringing)
Murphy: "Hullo?"
Chris: "Hello Murphy, it's Chris Tarrant here from Who Wants to be a
Millionaire. I have Paddy O'Reilly here and he's doing really
well on £64,000 but needs your help to get to £125,000. This
is a visual question, we're faxing you the photo now. Have
you received it?"
Murphy: "Yes, Chris."
Chris: "The next voice you hear will be Paddy's. He'll explain the
question and you'll have 30 seconds to answer. Fire away
Paddy."
Paddy: "Hullo there, Murphy."
Murphy: "Hullo, Paddy."
Paddy: "Murphy, that photo is a baby picture of which current Man
United player. I'm sure it's Beckham, what do you think?"
Murphy: "It's never Beckham, it's obviously Smichael."
Paddy: "You think so, Murphy?"
Murphy: "I'm sure."
Paddy: "Thanks, Murphy."
(hangs up)
Chris: "Well, a difference of opinion there. Do you want to stick on
£64,000 or play on for £125,000, Paddy?"
Paddy: "I want to play, I'm so sure it's Beckham I'm going to go with
me first answer: Beckham."
Chris: "You're saying Beckham?"
Paddy: "I am."
Chris: "Are you confident?"
Paddy: "Yes... Fairly..."
Chris: "You have £64,000 and you saying Beckham. If you're right you
go up to £125,000 and if you're wrong you walk away with
£32,000. Is Beckham your final answer?"
Paddy: "It is, Chris."
Chris: "Paddy............ I'm afraid it was wrong, sorry Paddy. Here
is your cheque for £32,000. You've been a great contestant
and a real gambler. Audience, please put your hands together
for Paddy!"
(applause...)
Paddy: "Before I go Chris, what was the correct answer? It's killing
me."
Chris: "Andy Cole."
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vladn02
Joined: Sep 17, 2007
Posts: 259
From: Ukraine
PM |
On 2007-10-24 21:38:32, nicv27 wrote:
Paddy is appearing on Who Wants To Be a Millionaire.
Chris: "Paddy you've done very well so far. You've got £64,000 and
one life line left - phone a friend. The next question will
give you £125,000 if you get it right but, if you get it
wrong, you'll will be out of the game and drop to £32,000.
Are you ready?"
Paddy: "For sure Chris, I am."
Chris: "On the screen is a photo of a current Manchester United
player as a baby. Which Manchester United player is it? Now
think about this carefully, Paddy, it's worth £125,000.
You're only three questions away from one million pounds."
Paddy: "I think I know who it is... er, but I'm not 100% sure... no
I'm sure it's Beckham, I'm sure it's Beckham... Can I phone a
friend, Chris, just to be sure?"
Chris: "Yes Paddy, who do you want to phone?"
Paddy: "I'll phone Murphy."
(ringing)
Murphy: "Hullo?"
Chris: "Hello Murphy, it's Chris Tarrant here from Who Wants to be a
Millionaire. I have Paddy O'Reilly here and he's doing really
well on £64,000 but needs your help to get to £125,000. This
is a visual question, we're faxing you the photo now. Have
you received it?"
Murphy: "Yes, Chris."
Chris: "The next voice you hear will be Paddy's. He'll explain the
question and you'll have 30 seconds to answer. Fire away
Paddy."
Paddy: "Hullo there, Murphy."
Murphy: "Hullo, Paddy."
Paddy: "Murphy, that photo is a baby picture of which current Man
United player. I'm sure it's Beckham, what do you think?"
Murphy: "It's never Beckham, it's obviously Smichael."
Paddy: "You think so, Murphy?"
Murphy: "I'm sure."
Paddy: "Thanks, Murphy."
(hangs up)
Chris: "Well, a difference of opinion there. Do you want to stick on
£64,000 or play on for £125,000, Paddy?"
Paddy: "I want to play, I'm so sure it's Beckham I'm going to go with
me first answer: Beckham."
Chris: "You're saying Beckham?"
Paddy: "I am."
Chris: "Are you confident?"
Paddy: "Yes... Fairly..."
Chris: "You have £64,000 and you saying Beckham. If you're right you
go up to £125,000 and if you're wrong you walk away with
£32,000. Is Beckham your final answer?"
Paddy: "It is, Chris."
Chris: "Paddy............ I'm afraid it was wrong, sorry Paddy. Here
is your cheque for £32,000. You've been a great contestant
and a real gambler. Audience, please put your hands together
for Paddy!"
(applause...)
Paddy: "Before I go Chris, what was the correct answer? It's killing
me."
Chris: "Andy Cole."
im sorry might be me, but i dont get that joke at all. if its even suppose to be a joke....
wtf man? funny stuff next time
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nicv27
Joined: Oct 15, 2002
Posts: > 500
From: kent
PM |
[
im sorry might be me, but i dont get that joke at all. if its even suppose to be a joke....
wtf man? funny stuff next time
Do you know who the Man united players mentioned are? David Beckham is White english, Peter schmeichel is white and from denmark(i believe) Andy cole is Black english.
It is a play on the much used theory in jokes that irish people are stupid(not a theory i subscribe to)
Just because you dont think it`s not funny wtf doesnt mean it isnt
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Access the forum with a mobile phone via esato.mobi
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Posted: 2007-10-13 23:00
TRIVIA
