Posted by axxxr
Dave Morgan used to consider himself a regular guy, but five years of Internet use have turned him into a complete and utter jackass, and he intends to make his Internet service provider pay damages for that.
"I used to be a nice guy," said Morgan. "Then I got on the Internet and it changed me. I started signing up at message boards, because they seemed fun. But it's so easy to get into arguments on them. Much easier than it is in real life, where someone can punch you in the face."
Soon Morgan was registering dozens of different screen names at multiple message boards, mercilessly attacking those he didn't like. "Sometimes I'd feel bad about that and register another handle, which I'd use to make friends with the person I'd been attacking. Then we would combine forces and start fighting with my previous handle. It got to be pretty confusing, even for me."
Morgan is seeking $2,000,000, or one dollar for each insult he's felt compelled to use. "I'm now what computer geeks would call an 'Internet troll,' he said. "I had no intention of becoming one. It just sort of happened. But maybe it wouldn't have if my ISP had provided some kind of warning when I first signed up. Maybe I'd still be normal."
Morgan then excused himself, because he had to construct a web page devoted to insulting an online enemy. "It's my third one this month. I'm getting very good at web design. The page will have graphics, pictures and plenty of abusive text, all of which I write myself, of course."
If he is denied the damages he's seeking, Morgan said he would settle for six free months of free Internet service. However, chances are he'll be receiving neither. A few words with one of Morgan's neighbors revealed that this raging troll may have been less than honest about his past.
"I don't know what he's like online, but the guy was never normal," said Gus Hadley. "He's always been a creepy sociopath. The kind of guy who'll trip you on the sidewalk and then help you up and pretend you fell over all by yourself."
Hadley is currently suing Morgan for $2,000,000 over just such an incident.
Posted by jagger2k
what a twat
Posted by axxxr
I think i should consider sueing my ISP for aiding my addiction to esato!
Who knows i might win!
Posted by djtwistter
lol they are not goignt o to pay him lol
Posted by arien617
Can't believe he thinks he's gonna win...
What an !diot
_________________
If at first you don't succeed, redefine the word success.
810i[ This Message was edited by: arien617 on 2007-01-30 21:23 ]
Posted by procterdc
Hmmm maybe we should sue esato..for making this forum so damn addictive!!!!
@ all moderators, I am JOKING please don't kick me off
Posted by rule_breaker
I would sue esato If I had a realistic chance of winning
Posted by Mulder7
Now that is just ridiculously stupid if they pay out to this guy.