| Author |
Job Application |
axxxr
Joined: Mar 21, 2003
Posts: > 500
From: Londinium
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This is an actual job application that a 17 year old boy submitted to McDonald's in Florida...and they hired him because he was so honest and funny!
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Name: Greg Bulmash.
Sex: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.
Desired position: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.
Desired salary: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.
Education: Yes.
Last position held: Target for middle management hostility.
Salary: Less than I'm worth.
Most notable achievement: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.
Reason for leaving: It sucked.
Hours available to work: Any.
Preferred hours: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.
Do you have any special skills?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.
May we contact your current employer?: If I had one, would I be here?
Do you have any physical conditions that would prohibit you from lifting up to 50 Lbs?: Of what?
Do you have a car?: I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?"
Have you received any special awards or recognition?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing House Sweepstakes.
Do you smoke?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.
What would you like to be doing in five years?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.
Do you certify that the above is true and complete to the best of your knowledge?: Yes. Absolutely.
Sign here: Aries.
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*Jojo*
Joined: Oct 15, 2003
Posts: > 500
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H m m m m . . . this is GREAT ! Will try to apply the 'style' at either: Wendy's or Burger King !
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EastCoastStar
Joined: Dec 07, 2003
Posts: > 500
From: orlando fl US
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figures its from my area! hahaha |
DarkWolfX
Joined: Apr 06, 2004
Posts: 431
From: Mexico
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Omg, "Sign here: Aries" ROFL !!! |
Cycovision
Joined: Nov 30, 2003
Posts: > 500
From: England
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Reminds me of a true story...
During my uni years, i used to work the holidays as a labourer for a small building firm. We were having a tea break one day when a HUGE, surley looking man (we later found out he was called Bill) marched onto the site, approached the forman and asked him for a job.
Forman: Have you ever worked on a building site before?
Bill: No.
Forman: Right, Ok. Well, are you any good at DIY or woodwork or anything like that?
Bill: No, not really.
Forman: Errrr... right. Well, we could do with another labourer I suspose. Have you ever mixed cement before?
Bill: No.
Forman: Well, not to worry you'll soon pick it up. We start at seven in the morning during the summer, will you be able to get here for seven?
Bill: I suspose so.
Forman: Look, I'm not being funny but you don't seem very keen. Are you sure you want to work on a building site?
Bill: No, not really.
Forman: Then why have you come here asking for a job?
Bill: Because the dole office made me.
He started work at seven the next day
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luigithfc
Joined: Sep 17, 2005
Posts: > 500
From: North London
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that was quite funny lol!!!
did he really get the job?
Feedback +34
T.H.F.C. |
kiwifly
Joined: Apr 30, 2006
Posts: 4
From: the front of a computer
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a pretty real job application!
i will hire him if i am the boss |
methylated_spirit
Joined: Jul 07, 2004
Posts: > 500
From: Bonnie Scotland
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hehehhehe thats great!
Hello, Scroto!
U.G.L.Y. You ain't got no alibi, you ugly! |
rockygali
Joined: Nov 21, 2005
Posts: > 500
From:
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hhmm with that kind of attitude McDonald's will definitely hir him... and make him the Next RONALD McDONALD clown.
indeed he's funny!
"Darkness is the absence of light.. and not the opposite..." |
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Posted: 2006-05-05 02:21
