Posted by KingBooker5
Got bored a few days ago so browsed the web, and found this. I thought it was amusing, so lets have it on esato! (probs heading to the garbage thread!) All you have to do, is post the most ridiculous lines that wont get you laid.
Ok I will start.
Hey baby, I post on esato mobile forums wanna go out with me?
Posted by pmerryman
Here's 10p, call your Mum, to tell her, you wont be home.
Posted by Sammy_boy
Is that a ladder in your tights or a stairway to heaven?
How do you like your eggs in the morning. Fertilised?
Old 'uns but classic 'uns!
Posted by thomas93
Hi, my name is Barry Scott and I'm going to cillit BANG you.
Posted by arien617
just over 5 hours, and they've still not garbaged this!
Posted by paul101
I have Skittles in my mouth, wanna taste the rainbow?
Posted by se_p800
I've lost my teddy
Can I sleep with you?
Please please please have sex with me, im so desperate.
Posted by leeboy13
theres a party at the back of your throat and im coming
Ive witnesses that one in action - needless to say, my mate got a slap....
Posted by procterdc
If you were my homework I'd be doing you rite now all over my desk!
Posted by gforce23
You must be the reason for global warming because you’re hot.
You know what? Your eyes are the same color as my Lada.
_________________
eBay: +21, -0
P1i, Nokia N95-2 (backup), Crackberry Curve 8320 (corporate)[ This Message was edited by: gforce23 on 2008-11-25 11:55 ]
Posted by brownie1989
you are so fit.
can you move to the side please as i cant watch the footy
Posted by >500
On 2008-11-25 07:36:27, leeboy13 wrote:
theres a party at the back of your throat and im coming
Ive witnesses that one in action - needless to say, my mate got a slap....
your mate actually used that?
Posted by pmerryman
Do you sleep on your Belly, if not can I.
Can you drive, reverse onto this.
Would you like a pearl necklace.
The list goes on.
Posted by brownie1989
i wanna make love right nanana
Posted by brownie1989
Ok lets go back 2 mine, but 1st take ur top off so i can make sure u aint got balloons up there
Posted by brownie1989
Or keep talking about her t!ts all nyt.
Posted by bronxdude
Your parents must be terrorists
because youre THE BOMB. heheh
Posted by alexslane
did you get a ticket for the cloakroom , if so get you ticket out you have pulled!
or dont be shy you mother was'nt
Posted by Tsepz_GP
"wow,the stars look great" (in BROAD DAYLIGHT!!)-Yes a friend of mine did this last year before id met him to some girl, his other mates will never let him forget it
"Im gona take you down to funky town!"
Posted by goldenface
How funny! I'm gonna come up with some crackers. Hang on....
Posted by goldenface
ave u got a mirror girl? Coz I can see myself in your pants before the end of the night...
Posted by coolharsh55
here's some originals...
shit! god reinforced my viginity! will you help me lose it???
i think i have a problem sleeping alone... company???
say, the world is coming to an end... how about a last sex???
say beauty, aint i handsome? and dont you want your children handsomer???
how about a private view of the parts before i am in contract???
i follow the religion of virility... wanna pray???
i heard my hands gossiping about your breasts... why not get them together and have a blast!
last night, you came in my dream and threatened that if i ever had sex with you, i'd go to hell... well, i wanna check if thats true...
hey girl, know what? your panty color matches m tie's!!!![this one is real, by a drunk man...]
if i wrote an encyclopedia about sex, you'd be on the cover...
[after a bit of arguing] say girl, lets settle this for once, lets have a pillow fight! now, whose bed, your's or mine?
you know what, my friend has a crush on you, so... will you go out with me?
i promise not to stalk you every night, if you prove that you can make me stay awake till morning...
hi, i am the body doctor, and there's something wrong with yours... it NEEEEDS to be used. mind lettin me try?
i am such a geek that usually i dont let girls drive me crazy... but today's your lucky night...
how are these?
Posted by markphil
a feather fell on my foot and i kept it because that day... i was thinkin' of my special angeL you know who my angeL is? check your wings, maybe a feather's missing..
Posted by Bonovox
Did you know 1 in 3 relationships never work out so guess we will just have to shag then
Posted by krazyd007
lol
Posted by se_dude
My bed is not done,so can i sleep with you tonite?
Posted by baconrollguy
did some one steal the stars from the sky and put them into your eyes !!
Posted by Dups!
Lol
Didn't realise how funny this thread was.
Posted by ceaser2008
I have just saw the dolphin flying in the sky.
that too in group. they were flying ahead of the plane.
Posted by Bonovox
I'll show you my tattoos if you show me yours
Posted by carkitter
My uncle used to wear a cap that said "Sex Instructor, first lesson free!"
Not sure what my aunty thought of it...
Posted by Bonovox
:-D LOL
Posted by ceaser2008
Yesterday i drove my bike at the speed of jet plane but still that bicycle beat me.
Posted by mriley
Just say to her- I know bonovox!
Posted by Bonovox
Eh? One of the worst things you can say on a date is YOU REMIND ME OF MY MOM lol
Posted by xnuo
one that will get you laid instantly in the USA: hi baby, my last name is kennedy...ted kennedy
one that won't: hi, my last name is bundy...ted bundy
Posted by Bonovox
Oh shit i remember the real life story of Ted Bundy murdered many women
No don't say that to a woman lol
Posted by ceaser2008
Today on the new year' eve, everybody wishes eachother 'happy new year'
Posted by Nanu
Does this rag smell of chloroform to you?
Posted by larry 68
Posted by Bonovox
Do you come here often? Or hey love i did'nt recognise you with your clothes on
Posted by xnuo
baby, would you f**k me??? i'd f**k me.... real hard....
Posted by 6230
I ain't no Fred Flinstone but I can make your Bedrock
Posted by xxambad4fellaxx
Nice legs! What time do they open??;)
Posted by ceaser2008
its weekend today
Posted by xxambad4fellaxx
You must be Jamaican..Coz Jamaican me crazy!!;)
Posted by tranced
Posted by ceaser2008
Today it is very hot here. Oh Jamaican, turn that fan on. FULL SPEED.
Posted by alexslane
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That's the best chat up line I have heard for ages.
I would say I would use that one myself but I am sure that the wife would object !
Posted by Bonovox
Nice dress it would look good on my bedroom floor