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Making Contact with Long Lost Relatives!


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Posted by Miss UK
This has been on my mind a while since I moved out of my mums anyways to cut things short I haven't seen my father for 21 years and the other day I decided to check the electorole to see who lived at the address given on my Birth Certificate and to my surprise my dads mom lives there still with another person maybe a Care worker as I pressume she's about 70ish now.

I done a search for the Postcode and thanks to Royal Mail ive got the full address (Wasn't gonna spend cash to browse the electorole )..

So ive decided to write a letter however I don't know what to write has anybody else been in this predictument???

any suggestions on what to write to my Fathers Mother lol

Help lolz


Posted by chrisfirst
Oh, dear... Well, that's not easy! How far is she? I mean you can always turn up and cut the waiting time! I now you have been waiting for 21 years, but I also know the feeling when you finaly managed to get something and you still have to wait for it!

Posted by *Jojo*
@miss uk - If I were in your Bally-shoes, I'd surely be looking for my botanical-father too !

Who knows . . . maybe you are an heiress to one of the finest conglomerate/companies in the whole-wide-world


Trace the addy - pronto !

Posted by Miss UK
She lives in Arbroath Scotland im in the West Midlands!
my father was abit of a drunk and abused my mother,

I wish to send a letter see if I get a response don't want my mom knowing tbh.. were not really at eye to eye atm anyways so doing this wouldn't make a difference!

I just wanna get intouch see what there like and go from there!

My Father I have no idea where he lives but after a name search on the Electorole again hmm I think I may have details and to my surprise it looks like he never married again neither

Posted by *Jojo*
@miss uk - I understand your predicament here . . . YES, send a letter with a photo of you attched . . . THEN and NOW, so your Dad can identify you better. If you still have a photo of YOU, your Mom and Him when you were still small - the BETTER !


DNA testing is not that far from your plans I guess?

Posted by Miss UK
JoJo we lost all the photo's when we moved from Scotland I can't remember what my father looked like lol

Say I do the letter what do I write in there c'mon guys

Posted by *Jojo*

On 2007-07-24 02:20:37, miss uk wrote:
JoJo we lost all the photo's when we moved from Scotland I can't remember what my father looked like lol

Say I do the letter what do I write in there c'mon guys



@miss uk - So better attach your latest pic in the letter . . . Say, everything what you know of, from the start . . . your Dad will surely be looking for vital-answers/proofs that comes along with your letter, as he might think that you are an IMPOSTOR or what . . .

Better do it fast dear, your Dad is ageing I know . . . you just never know what is still in store for him on this planet-Earth . . . I mean you know, sickness and all . . . (knock-on-wood).

Take every second in your clock - counts!

Posted by Miss UK
JoJo you gotta remember it's my dads mother im writing to not him,
she will be old now and well the letter will be sent to her!

I wanna send a letter without Photo,
I need it to be relistic so she knows I am her Grand Daughter when she sends me a reply I will send her a picture,

doing this just incase ive got the details wrong etc!

_________________
You Got-Too-be Cruel... Too Be Kind

[ This Message was edited by: miss uk on 2007-07-24 01:34 ]

Posted by *Jojo*
@miss uk - I thought that we were talkin' about your Daddy here Well anyways, I guess your Grandma loves you better than your Daddy does - right

Yes, letter first prior to picture !

Go, GO, GO . . . start typin' that letter ! i know that the feeling is like heaven when you get reunited with old-folks . . . literally and figuratively !

Posted by goldenface
I'd advise you to be very careful and from what I have read, you're not much older than 21 years yourself are you Miss UK?

Have you asked yourself why you would like to see him again?

Have you taken your mam's feelings into account? Does she know your embarking on this mini-adventure?

Things like this can re-open a lot of old wounds so I would advise you to get as much info as you can first of all and be very careful.

A similar thing happened to me so if you would like to chat more then pm.



_________________


[ This Message was edited by: goldenface on 2007-07-24 15:15 ]

Posted by haynesycop
I did this same thing and wrote to my Dad about 4 years ago, guess i was curious. He still lived at the same address so i sent a letter and got a reply. To cut a long story short we met up i saw him for a couple of months once a week and then sent him an email (people can say that was mean but where was he all my life?) that i didn't want to see him again.

Just didn't feel right at all. He was all over me but i realised that i didn't need him in my life and my Mum has always and will always be the most important and precious thing in my life. He didn't reply and i've heard nothing since (quite happy this way) and don't want to hear from him again.

I know you don't get on with your Mum but think long and hard before you decide to do this and the reasons behind it. I was lucky my Dad was all over me and wanted to start over but it didn't feel right. Are you prepared if he turned round and told you he wanted nothing to do with you?

Whatever you decided to do best of luck and i hope it works out well.



Posted by Miss UK
I know it could turn out pear shaped in the longrun but it's my dads mother she is getting on abit and I think if ive anything left of a family then I should go about this now (Get it over with)

My Mom will be upset but after what shes put m through she's upset me saying alot of shite like "I wish you had never been born"

she has dis-owned me properly and I feel this is the next step im not doing it cos of her Im doing it cos I think it's necessary

1 little note can go along way but I have to think what to write lol



Posted by goldenface
Well it sounds like you have made up your mind already and it also sounds like you have nothing to lose if you do.

Good luck and I hope it all goes well for you!



Posted by Miss UK
Yeah I'll get onto the letter haven't a clue what im gonna write lol

Posted by goldenface
Do you know when his birthday is? You could send him a card.

Posted by Miss UK
No I know nothing about him except he's a year older then my mum

Posted by Miss UK
I sent a letter last Friday so hmm the wait will be a fright

Posted by djtwistter

On 2007-09-26 18:55:53, miss uk wrote:
I sent a letter last Friday so hmm the wait will be a fright


gud luck

Posted by lastikcizme
I hope you can reach out to her heart. Best of luck..

Posted by Miss UK
Yeah thanks i'll keep all informed what happens

Posted by *Jojo*
@haynescop - Well. be it as it may . . . but you just should NOT forget that if it was NOT for your Dad . . . you are NOT here today . . . !

Posted by Twometre
Miss uk I sympathies with you because Iam deep in your shoes. I also never met my father until I was 18 years old. I heard about him and I started inquring. I got his number and didnt use it. Instead I calle my brother whom I have never met too. When he asked who I was I told him to call his dad and ask him. I then took it from there and it was a lot easier to meet him then as he was a bit soften.

Posted by Miss UK
yeah there are alot of people who like myself and you that are contenplating doing this but its our decision

did you call him dad or by his realname at first?

I do hope I get a letter back everyday now is a wait for me

Posted by Lo-couk

On 2007-07-24 02:09:52, *Jojo* wrote:
@miss uk - If I were in your Bally-shoes, I'd surely be looking for my botanical-father too !

Who knows . . . maybe you are an heiress to one of the finest conglomerate/companies in the whole-wide-world


Trace the addy - pronto !


@ Jo jo
"Botanical-father"? Jo jo? Don't get me wrong,but are you some kinda plant? Myself, being human would rather look for a biological parentage. Kew gardens holds many mysterys and by the looks of things in this forum there's an undiscovered one!!!


Posted by *Jojo*
@lo - Yeah matey . . . BOTANICAL/BIOLOGICAL/BIOGRAPHY/BIO-DATA/BIO-A-GIFT/BIO-AN- FONE etc. etc. they are all but the very SAME dude !


@curry - Any news about your: Papa-Don't-Preach dear

Posted by Miss UK
No letter yet JoJo...
it will be a wait I have to wait I guess everyday tho it gets exciting when the Postman comes he does take the pee to post though 2pm in the afternin


Posted by *Jojo*

On 2007-09-28 01:06:04, miss uk wrote:
No letter yet JoJo...
it will be a wait I have to wait I guess everyday tho it gets exciting when the Postman comes he does take the pee to post though 2pm in the afternin



@carry - What IF . . . . . . . the POSTMAN is your - Dad

Posted by Miss UK
No chance that being tru JoJo..

I live in Birmingham he lives in Scotland

Posted by lastikcizme
Any updates on this, miss uk? Sorry, it's none of my business, but curiosity got the best of me.

Posted by Miss UK
Sigh Nothing yet

Posted by djtwistter

On 2007-10-04 00:22:07, miss uk wrote:
Sigh Nothing yet


time and pacienct will bring you nice results

Posted by Miss UK
Hope so I need some excitement in my life lol

everyday im eager to see if the postmans delievered any letters btw!!

Posted by *Jojo*
@carry - Maybe this Christmas dear . . . if so, it will be the BEST to date - right

Posted by Miss UK
JoJo would be nice if sooner

Posted by *Jojo*

On 2007-10-04 01:16:51, miss uk wrote:
JoJo would be nice if sooner



@curry - The soonest would be either: Halloween or All Saint's Day . . . .

Posted by Miss UK
Yep but abit sooner then that tho


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