Posted by leeboy13
Right i got a leefing this is heading for garbage..... but what teh hell lets give it a shot.....
The idea is to pick your animal and weapon, rememeber think about the animals: speed, Agility, manuverabillity, how they may 'hold' or get teh weapon straped to them.
No real rules except that one animal / one weapon...... you cant have a warm of bees with laser beams..... lol
Now to all those animal rights people, this is only fun, not really gonna do it *roll of eyes*....
Im backing a pigeon as these things are deadly even with out any weapons (never look up, it'll poop in your eye)!
any suggestions guys and girls
Posted by methylated_spirit
Pigeon, is it? Right, i pit my mongoose against your pigeon! Small, fast, agile, has a good diet of nutritious eggs to give it vitality, and its brown!
[ This Message was edited by: methylated_spirit on 2006-05-05 11:45 ]
Posted by leeboy13
awwww thats a fair fight me thinks.... mate pigeons are indistructable.. ive seen one walking around with its head hanging off - for real.....
what weapon are you choosing matey?
Im still developing/researching my weapon of choice.....
Anyone else gonna throw their animal into this pit of distruction?
*added - ive also seem pigeons eating sick... anyone who can do that withour re-throwing up must be hard as nails*
[ This Message was edited by: leeboy13 on 2006-05-05 10:47 ]
Posted by methylated_spirit
Hmm, i reckon my mongoose will be armed with an egg whisk, for mashing your pigeon up with! Being an egg eater, its already used to the operation of such a device, and can use its cunning mind to alter the egg whisk for maiming purposes.
Your rebuttal, kind sir? How would your pigeon counter this threat?
Posted by JK
I choose a hyena!!
Posted by leeboy13
by flying over you and piss on your mongoose - this would trigger anelectric shock to stun you mongoosy before i deliver the killer finishing move
weapon of choice - ETC gun
for more info on my weapon please visit:
http://www.azom.com/details.asp?newsID=923
how will yopur mongoose stand to that
@786kbr - hyena yeh? nice choice..... and weapons hes/shes sporting?
[ This Message was edited by: leeboy13 on 2006-05-05 10:58 ]
Posted by methylated_spirit
Ooooh, tough moves, lee! However, with a deft flick of his little mammal wrist, i believe my mongoose would have the cunning and skill to use the egg whisk as an Earth, so that the electric shock would be deflected. Now, this would save my mongoose, but it would destroy his weapon, leaving him open to attack...Pigeon would win it, i reckon, but only just!
Posted by leeboy13
lmao! i wouldnt worry mate, the stupid pigeons leg fell off and dropped the ETC gun...... damn it! its an open battlefield now, both animals weaponless and my pigeon one legged!
Posted by methylated_spirit
EDIT: Damn, i was trying to embed "eye of the tiger" but it appears you can't do that any more!
_________________
Hello, Scroto!
[ This Message was edited by: methylated_spirit on 2006-05-05 11:50 ]
Posted by leeboy13
ive been thinking about his all morning now and i reckon teh ULTIMATE animal with weapon has to be a turtle with a AK-47 attched....
This is becuse the lil fella could hid in his shell and mow down any approching enemy with his AK-47 muhahahahhaha
Posted by methylated_spirit
Nice, lee, also the shell would provide protection from the blast of a grenade thrown by a snake!
Posted by Cycovision
Maybe, but the turtle would have no chance against a grass snake with a flame thrower. It's speed and agility coupled with a slender body would make it very hard to hit, and the turtle would quickly roast in it's shell under the immense heat.
EDIT: Meths beat me to it, great minds and all that
_________________
'He who laughs last, laughs longest. Or didn't get the joke...'
[ This Message was edited by: Cycovision on 2006-05-05 11:53 ]
Posted by leeboy13
lol...... ohh the turtle is defeated by the snake
now what to counteract teh snake with - bearing in mind this badboy is sporting a flame thrower! ummmmmmm this may need a bit of thought!
im thinking i will keep 'danger' mouse for later
@meths... lol, would of be a classic call if that music had work...... dont worry tho i got that song implanted into my head form when i used to swim lol (i used to race 1 mile so i sung that song a fair few times during the race) lol
Posted by methylated_spirit
Mongoos''es'es'ses' (god knows what the plural is, maybe mongi?? Anyway...) eat snakes, so my mongoose with the egg whisk could have a good ol' gung-ho scrap with cyco's grass snake and flame thrower!
I would like to intrroduce a new contender...a goldfish with a Torpedo launcher instead of a tinkle! Yes, "Red Knobtober" shall be king of the deep!
Posted by OluYom
Ok, here I am with my pet eagle spotting a nuclear-tipped Tomahawk underneath each wing. Hopefully, it can put an end to this animal farm thingie with one swoop
Posted by leeboy13
the fight is on - ive drawn an artists impression of the ruckuss!
why oh why did i use paint.......... if we get enough interest out of thsi thread i will start doing cool photoshop ones
Posted by batesie
my Stealth Cloaking Super Ant can invade and disrupt all other esatonian superpowers unoticed...
Posted by leeboy13
@ batsie: i will crush him with my one legged pigeon! muhuhhuhuh!
how will you counteract that one?
Posted by Cycovision
I'm afraid not. My scorpion with a bucket of oil would be able to quickly ground your eagle and, being a scorpion, it will be able to resist the intense radiation after the nuclear blast.
Posted by leeboy13
would i be aloud to change my animal to King Kong with a bannana?
I ahve a good feeling about king kong!
Posted by OluYom
| Quote: |
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Not fair
My eagle is supposed to be out of reach of your scorpion. But ok - since my eagle is supposedly dead now or something; can I get another animal?
Posted by leeboy13
right i got the weapon for my pigeon as i feel that king kong will not be allowed.... my pigeon (1 legged) is back sporting a thundercats sword, this would give teh pigeon 'sight beyond sight' making him bloody ard! also he would be able to call the other thundercats along with their tank! hooorah!
Posted by methylated_spirit
I've just found a chimpanzee and a bucket of turds in the cupboard! Rock on!
My machete-toting squirrel is lethal, i reckon it could bound over your snake-thrower and slash it into mush before your pathetic worm could even turn round...
_________________
Hello, Scroto!
[ This Message was edited by: methylated_spirit on 2006-05-05 13:00 ]
Posted by Cycovision
Aha! But you've made a critical mistake by choosing a red squirrel. My grey squirrel armed with a pair of nunchu... nunchakk... nunchi err... those two sticks attatched to a length of chain will quickly overtake your red squirrels natural habitat in a matter of decades, confining it to small areas of kent or something.
Posted by leeboy13
i friken love the ramdoness of this thread!
Posted by leeboy13
ah - got ya both... my pigeon shits nut like objects which fools the squirals into believing that my pigeon is a tree which produces nuts, giving my pigoen the oppertunity strike!!!!!!! thunder, thunder, thunde cats - hooooooooo!
Posted by methylated_spirit
Ahhh, but that small area of Kent is our amarillo, er, armadillo, erhm, *cough* alamo! Yeah, thats the one...Anyway, we shall defend this! From above, pigeons dropping ammonia-laced bombs, and from ground level, teenage mutant ninja grey squirrels, we shall defend ourselves! All we want is a plot of tree we can homestead in and play with our nuts.
BTW, who is the artist? Must be very brave to get that close to such a heated battle, and to capture it in such detail! I'm impressed...
_________________
Hello, Scroto!
[ This Message was edited by: methylated_spirit on 2006-05-05 14:26 ]
Posted by Cycovision
Ha! You forget my army of red ants. Their bites produce formic acid which will quickly react with your alkali ammonia bombs to produce vast quantities of salt, which will effortlessly dispose of those bothersome UN peace-keeping slugs.
Once done, my poodles will have no trouble securing your pitiful area of rural kent using just a small pen knife, and maybe a packet or two of after dinner mints.
Posted by methylated_spirit
Alas, i have been vanquished! My bale of straw and Lenny Henry dvd (OOOOOOOOOOOOKAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!) are no match for your after eight mints!
Posted by jack77777
a pigeon tied to a nuclear bomb.
Posted by Cycovision
No, no NO!!! If you tied a pigeon to a nuclear bomb it would never be able to take off!
An albatros with a rocket up it's arse, now that's a different matter altogether...
Posted by leeboy13
also one problem with teh nuke and pigeon... surely hed die too making the contest a draw......
Posted by SCORPIONKING1982
Im going to throw into the ring my ninja dolphin who has left his homeland to train at a prestigious naval college and is now captain of a frickin nuclear sub. so not only is he a ninja, and a dolphin, he has a whole submarine as a weapon! is this allowed? i dont know, i only know itd kick ass!
Posted by Cycovision
That's absolutely correct. Nuclear weapons have always been considered retro-active to the ultimate goals of a successful military campaign, rather they are confined to the psychological aspect of warfare as 'the ultimate deterent.'
I don't actually know what that means, but I think it means that you can't tie the string tight enough to prevent the pigeon from escaping and leaving the nuclear bomb behind so that you end up blowing yourself up.
@Scorpion
Yes, dolphins trained in the martial arts with access to submarines are perfectly legal, but please do be carefull because the coastline of rural Kent is rather treacherous in places. I once cut my big toe on a broken seven-up bottle on Leysdown BEach.
_________________
'He who laughs last, laughs longest. Or didn't get the joke...'
[ This Message was edited by: Cycovision on 2006-05-05 15:46 ]
Posted by leeboy13
ummmmmmm were bordering on cyborgs here
lol
i dont dont, how do the other contenstants feel? are we gonna allow terminator style animals... i think we may be going a bit unrealistic if we do
Posted by leeboy13
ITS ON NOW - CONTENDERS READY?
anyone guess im bored? - but loving this
[ This Message was edited by: leeboy13 on 2006-05-05 16:09 ]
Posted by methylated_spirit
Jesus! Good work, fella!
I have a toad who was trained by Mr Miyagi after he was bullied by bigger toads at school. He needs no other weaponry. I would not hesitate to pit my toad against Chuck Norris. He's that hard.
Posted by Cycovision
Wow, I'm impressed
Just one question, why does my squirrel look like Stephen from Bo Selecta's Bedtime with the Bear? I'm not complaining, but if the other contenders start calling him a nob jockey, it might put them at an unfair advantage
Posted by zyexx
Now...the fatal flaw in all your plans has to do with the fact that my mutant chihuahua has an EMP (electromagnetic pulse) device installed in his belly. He can detonate this pulse at will, destroying any electronic circuit within 100 miles, rendering your technology useless.
Once your weapons have been destroyed, he is free to run around and pee on all of his enemies...by the way, his pee is concentrated sulphuric ACID!!!!
Posted by SCORPIONKING1982
awesome pic leeboy
one question, how is my ninja dolphin going to get his sub in the ring?
edit: if i cant have my sub i will arm my aquatic killing machine with his trusty ninja sword and let him flip out on yo ass's.
_________________
People should not be afraid of their governments, governments should be afraid of their people
[ This Message was edited by: SCORPIONKING1982 on 2006-05-05 18:36 ]
Posted by leeboy13
lmao! i got the grey squirral wrong, i thought you said brown - oppsy
ALso forgot the mongoose (mofo! )
Right peeps, we got teh weekend to put our fantisys/dreams into reality.. im grabing the first pigeon i see and pimping that mofo up!
Posted by methylated_spirit
I ruined a couple of squirrels and the goldfish i won at the fair wasnt large enough to equip with a torpedo launcher, so i'm going to try it with a salmon tonight
Posted by leeboy13
im having differcultly getting hold of a etc gun... anyone got any ideas? ive tried ebay but no luck... ive also emailed a number of teh worlds most wanted men but im getting 'out of office' replies
as for a pigeon, ive caught two so far and both look as if they got what it takes...
all teh best with your salmon meths
(i'm feeding my pigeon fish this week then - get the taste buds going)
lee
Posted by methylated_spirit
Cheers Lee, i'm feeding my salmon some mushed-up pigeon brains, and making it watch videos of Nazis and nuclear explosions, so it should be in a good mood. Should be quite a good contest!
Posted by leeboy13
love it!
thats some good tactics you are using there, be very interested in seeing how your mongoose turns out... you never know Mi5 may be interested in using your methods
Posted by methylated_spirit
Yeah, th CIA are interested in my chimpanzee and bucket of turds, thats why its not in the arena yet, in case they buy it!
Posted by Cycovision
Bucket of turds? I thought biological warfare was banned? I'm not allowed to arm my poodles with custard pies!
Posted by zyexx
It is banned??...does this mean my dog cant piss on ya'll
Posted by Burgaz
i'm f**king lost could someone please update me on what the hell is going on so i can join in??
Posted by Cycovision
Right, as it stands we have a stalemate in rural Kent. There's scorpionking's ninja dolphin in a nuclear submarine, meth's monkey with a bucket of turds and my albatros with a rocket up it's arse. They're all dug-in at the moment, smoking woodbines, eating bully beef and writing god-awful poetry.
If I've missed any protagonists, please take the time to add them before battle commences.