Posted by batesie
Planes packed with 800,000 Britons make the journey Down Under each year to take in Australia's famed natural beauty. But amid headlines of shark and crocodile attacks, are there a few hazards that visitors should be aware of?
The sunshine, good life, beach culture and natural wonders make Australia the destination of choice for thousands of Brits.
Whether it's the "trip of a lifetime", the honeymoon or one of the 40,000 year-long holiday visas used each year, the attraction is obvious.
"The temperature and conditions, even in the winter months, it's still hotter than an English summer," says Australian Lynette Eyb, editor of backpacker magazine TNT.
"The beaches and the East Coast have always been popular, Perth and Western Australia increasingly so.
"Tasmania is beautiful for walking and the outdoors, the rivers and the forests down there.
DEADLY CRITTERS
Saltwater Crocodiles
Great White Shark
Brown snake
Funnel-web spider
Box jellyfish
Blue ring octopus
"You could spend years getting to know it and seeing it all."
Emigration is set to step up. The Australian government this week launched its biggest drive to attract skilled workers since the "£10 Poms" took to their boats last century.
As a result, the figure of 20,000 Brits a year emigrating is expected to increase to 25,000.
With a shared language, common culture, good transport, peace, security and open people, Australia is seen as one of the easier sections of a round-the-world trip.
But as the death of a British man this week - probably killed by a four-metre crocodile off the northern coast - illustrates, in the most extreme circumstances, that it can be a very hostile place.
If confirmed, it will be the second such fatal attack within weeks in northern Australia, and record numbers of saltwater crocodiles have caused the closure of some sites in the Northern Territory's Kakadu National Park.
The death happened on the same day an Australian surfer fought off a great white shark with his bare hands off the coast near Kangaroo Island in South Australia.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/4287452.stm
Posted by DJcreamz
you arse junkie!!you couldnt resist could ya
Posted by batesie
well i thought i'd better warn you of the dangers out there. ive also copied in your girlfriend on the email.
Posted by grahamsounes
Dont forget the indiginous population, sweetie pie
Posted by batesie
well you'll have a great time down there with the locals creamsie
Posted by Cycovision
That's right. It'll not just be kangaroos that get tied down once you're there, sport
Posted by batesie
ROTFLMAOTICIFOTJCHM
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Do Not Follow Where The Path May Lead.
Go Instead Where There Is No Path; and leave a Trail. - JMC
[ This Message was edited by: batesie on 2005-09-28 17:22 ]
Posted by whizkidd
Posted by Gigs
New Zealand - while not big, we're just not as deadly to live in!
Posted by Davo_169
i heard somewhere that your more likely to fall off a hundred story building that get attacked by a shark...
bunch or paranoid fools
Posted by methylated_spirit
my mate drowned in a ballibong, drve his Yute straight into it. He was too busy checking out shrimp prices for his barby
Posted by batesie
watch out for low flying boomerang
Koala Bears and possums are quite deadly too...
Posted by Davo_169
your all racist preDICKdable idiots!
its all a stereotypes
Posted by JK
sheep shaggers.. 
Is your girls name Baaarbara?
Posted by carkitter
Don't forget to take a photo of the Ashes with you when you go...
Posted by Davo_169
@massuer
can i have a bit of backup here
i know your a proud aussie at heart
Posted by batesie
well i am afraid to say i'm an eighth Australian but they went the on there own accord not because they stole farm animals...
Posted by Davo_169
that one made me spit out my coke lol
top stuff
Posted by batesie
no worries sport
Posted by Davo_169
cheerio guv'na
Posted by gelfen
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that's kiwis you twit!
it's a statistical fact that you are more likely to be struck by lightening than attacked by either a shark or croc. and the only reason a croc will attack is in defense of it's territory or because it has been provoked in some way.
hopefully this will clear up a few misconceptions:
gelfen's tourism guide to australia
Posted by JK
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Its the Aussies mate!!!
Posted by gelfen
you only think that 'cos all the bloody un-zudders move over here.
Posted by carkitter
We only send the convicts over there mate!
As the late former NZ Prime Minister Sir Robert Muldoon once said, when asked about Kiwis emigrating to Oz, "It raises the average IQ of both countries".
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[ This Message was edited by: carkitter on 2005-10-06 09:24 ]
Posted by gelfen
go for walk on the farm with your gumboots ya bloody sheep enjoyer.
Posted by Falcon786
i think my uncles from there.really mate.neva could leave him alone with da sheep when he came here though!sheep shaggers!o n he kept on talking about how he wrestled a croc once!typical australian hero,ala crocodile dundee?
Posted by carkitter
My grandmother was a Petersen, the same strain as Sir Joh Bejelke.
And I'm a townie, can't tell you the last time I saw a sheep.
As such the rest of NZ call us Aucklanders, JAFA's.
- Just
- Another
- F-----g
- Aucklander
We really don't care. Auckland is where it's at. Full stop.
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[ This Message was edited by: carkitter on 2005-10-06 09:46 ]
Posted by Davo_169
@gelfen
and the cavalry arrives
good to see the patriotism is strong in you
Posted by batesie
stop hijacking my thread!
its about the dangers of the outback....
Posted by Davo_169
ill be a danger for you outback in a minute if you dont stop whinging!
Posted by batesie
isnt it past your bedtime, sport?
Posted by Davo_169
getting there but im on school holidays and mum lets me stay up till weneva i like...GUV'NA!
Posted by methylated_spirit
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what about when they are hungry
Posted by batesie
then you go down yer local QuickieMart and buy a Barbie, Sport.
Posted by methylated_spirit
can i go in me UTE? Ya flamin' Gallaaah!
Seriously, though, i work with an Australian and he's gay. That means 100% of all Aussies that i know are gay. What a statistic, 100% of australians are gay! It's not looking great for you guys, is it? This will be the last generation of Australians...When you all die, i'm going to live there. And not be gay.
Posted by Davo_169
hahah flamin' gallah...strooth!
you been watching home and away meths?
Posted by methylated_spirit
You're australian, are you gay? It would go a long way to proving my theory, or disproving it, depending on your answer.
Posted by ADT0079
but it's us americans that are stuck up and think we are better than everyone. else'thanks batsie or whatever you call yourself i would have to say you are a bigger asshole than me. congrats
Posted by carkitter
Being serious now for a moment, do me a favour and promise me you won't go hitchiking while your downunder.
Bad things occasianally happen to tourists who hitchike in rural Oz and NZ. There's nothing worse than a nationwide search for the killer of some innocent tourist, which is what is happening here in NZ at the moment.
Posted by batesie
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Reading past the poor punctuation, I see someone that seems to have taken a severe disliking to me. Is it anything in particular that I have said to personally offend you?
If you want to compare biggest a$$hole sizes, the Americans win hands down, being constantly shafted by American politicians...
_________________
Do Not Follow Where The Path May Lead.
Go Instead Where There Is No Path; and leave a Trail. - JMC
[ This Message was edited by: batesie on 2005-10-07 10:39 ]
[ This Message was edited by: batesie on 2005-10-07 10:42 ]
Posted by DJcreamz
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WOW im so proud to meet the guy that was educated in the english laungage by a chimp, i have read so much about you, the honour is great.
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se-nse
Spurious Nonesense
[ This Message was edited by: DJcreamz on 2005-10-07 10:22 ]
Posted by carkitter
Since we're detouring off topic to discuss punctuation, lets throw in spelling and sentence structure while we're at it.
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[ This Message was edited by: carkitter on 2005-10-07 10:45 ]
Posted by batesie
Thanks for the tip. But theres plenty more dangerous things happening out there than bad punctuation/spelling/capitalisation.
like BIG HAIRY SPIDERS!
Posted by carkitter
And the ants. Don't forget those vicious ants
Posted by methylated_spirit
Big bunch of Sheilas, the lot of you! Spider, ants, pah! Wait until you see an angry haggis!
Posted by batesie
its the kilts scare me more....
Posted by DJcreamz
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ok lets
Posted by carkitter
@DJcreamz
I disagree. Just because the statement is informal, that does not make its structure incorrect.
@meths
Can you post a picture of a haggis in full fury?
@batesie
Touche.
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[ This Message was edited by: carkitter on 2005-10-07 11:59 ]
Posted by methylated_spirit
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No, they are mysterious creatures, visible only to the naked eye. Every time someone has attempted to take a photo of one, the photo has never developed.
Posted by DJcreamz
renember the great 'Haggis Fake' in 1962 meth?
A scottish salmon farmer name Hamish McBeefcake built a crude representation of a haggis using bolsa wood and general 'all purpose does exactly what is says on the tin' glue and then using a complicated remote control system consisting of a piece of yarn and two trees faked a shot that cept the media busyt for weeks. It was finnaly proved as a fake when sadly Mr McBeefcake was found hanging in his salmon shed with a confession note.
The curse of the haggish still haunts the McBeefcake Clan to this day.